“Life is a series of moments, coloured by our perspectives”

You might have heard that “perception is reality”, and there is a lot of debate about it, whether it is true or not. This is because your perceptions can be true or can even be false and misleading. But there is something that is definitely true, and that is perceptions can’t be true for relationships. 

Creating perceptions in any relationship can create misunderstanding and can even ruin them. For example, you might feel that there is a person in your class or office who does not like you, but instead, they might not have any negative feelings toward you. There is a possibility that your perceptions are wrong, he/she might just be an introvert.

Hello, I am Aishwarya Tharoor, and here in this blog, I will discuss reality vs. perception, and how you can navigate misunderstandings in your relationships.

Let’s first understand the difference between reality and perception.

Reality vs Perception: Difference

Reality	Perception
Objective: It’s the actual, factual existence of things or events.	Subjective: It’s how we interpret and understand reality.
Consistent: Reality remains the same regardless of personal beliefs or opinions.	Influenced: Perception is shaped by personal experiences, beliefs, and biases.
External: It exists independent of individual interpretation	Variable: Differs among individuals based on their perspectives.
Tangible: It includes concrete, measurable elements.	Interpretive: It involves the filtering and processing of information based on personal understanding.

Let’s now discuss how perception influences relationships and causes misunderstandings.

How Does Perception Influence Relationships And Cause Misunderstandings?

Perception plays a significant role in shaping relationships and often contributes to misunderstandings due to several key factors:

1. Interpretation Bias: As humans, we tend to filter the information based on our perceptions, which can lead to selective attention to some specific things and ignore the rest. These perceptions influence how we behave or communicate with others, and that can lead to misunderstandings. For example, let’s say there is a student named Mary in a class, and she has a reserved nature. When she tries to participate in class and answers, her teacher perceiving her as typically reserved, unconsciously dismisses her input, assuming it lacks depth. This can cause misunderstandings between a student and a teacher.

2. Emotional Influences: Sometimes even our emotions can colour perceptions, which can cause individuals to interpret situations or behaviors through an emotional lens rather than an objective one. For example, when we are upset, we stop seeing anything good around us. Even when people try to help you, you will think that they are not helping but trying to take advantage of you, and thus it can lead to misunderstanding.

3. Communication Challenges: Misreading Cues like different interpretations of body language, tone, or facial expressions can also cause misunderstandings. You should try to communicate clearly with the people if you think there is some misunderstanding. And you should strictly avoid assuming things just based on facial expressions, body language, and different tones.

4. Biases and Stereotypes: People tend to seek information that confirms their existing beliefs, leading to selective interpretation of behaviors that align with those beliefs. So, we should not believe preconceived notions or stereotypes about certain individuals or groups.

5. Lack of Perspective Taking: Not understanding or appreciating another person’s perspective can lead to misinterpretations. So, you should avoid judging the other person without considering the other person’s perspective.

6. Impact on Relationships: Misunderstandings, if not addressed, can escalate into conflicts, impacting the quality of relationships. If these misunderstandings persist then it can erode trust in any relationship.

You can manage your perspectives and achieve a balance in your life and relationships. If the negative perceptions are not resolved, they can lead to misunderstandings and strained relationships.

How To Resolve The Misunderstanding In The Relationships?

Understanding how perception influences interpretations and interactions is crucial for navigating relationships effectively. It requires open communication, active listening, empathy, and a willingness to consider diverse perspectives to minimize misunderstandings and foster healthier relationships. Let’s discuss these points:

1. Pause and Reflect: You should take a moment to pause and reflect on your perceptions before you actually believe them before reacting. You should also reflect on how your perceptions might be influencing your interpretation of the situation.

2. Open and Honest Communication: You should have proper clear and honest communication with the person you have misunderstandings with. Actively listening to them and understanding their perspectives will help you solve misunderstandings and strained relationships. You should also express your emotions and thoughts clearly to the other person after listening to them.

3. Empathy and Understanding: To understand the other person’s feelings and emotions, you need to be empathetic. This means that you have to put yourself in the other person’s shoes. And understand their background, experiences, and emotions that shape their perceptions. You should not hesitate to explain your point and perspective to sort things out.

4. Validate Emotions and Feelings: You should acknowledge the other person’s emotions, even if you don’t agree with their perception. This is because validating feelings fosters a sense of understanding and respect.

5. Focus On Finding The Solutions, and Avoid Blaming: You should avoid blaming others, and focus on finding the solution. You should use “I” statements to express your perspective without blaming or accusing. Collaborate on finding common ground or a mutually beneficial outcome.

6. Seek Mediation, If The Situation Escalates: If the misunderstanding persists or escalates, you should consider involving a neutral third party, such as a mediator or counselor, to facilitate the discussion.

While solving the misunderstandings in your relationships with friends, partners, parents, siblings, relatives, colleagues, etc. you should protect your mental health and understand where to draw your boundaries.

End Note:

The interplay between reality and perception is a nuanced facet of human interaction. Our perceptions, shaped by experiences and biases, often influence how we interpret reality, leading to misunderstandings that impact relationships and communication. For more such expert advice explore my blogs.